The US Chamber of Commerce is reportedly growing very
concerned over the sudden sharp drop in American worker productivity caused
according to most experts by the dangerous record levels of cognitive
dissonance the public is being exposed to.
“We’ve way prematurely reached the tipping point,” said
Chamber of Commerce President and CEO Thomas J. Donohue. “By the tens and tens
of millions we’ve now got so-called workers up to their spinning ears in the
need to sit down somewhere and just get their bearings.
“This wasn’t supposed to happen for another couple of
generations.”
Explained Raymond Whithers, the Chamber’s Chief
Misinformation Officer, “Cognitive dissonance is a lot like radiation in terms
of its cumulative toxic consequences. Human beings can only be exposed to so
much of it over a lifetime before the strain of reconciling the unreconcilable
throws their equilibrium so out of whack that they become more or less useless
to the Maker class.”
Said the Chamber’s Donohue, “It’s the political and military
and religious and media guys we all have to thank for this maxing of the
American people out on ideas that don’t remotely square with reality.
“We could have avoided this moment for half a century or
more if we’d kept the cognitive dissonance down to the levels associated with
pushing supply-side, trickle-down, unregulated economics.
“There would have been room left over even for corporate
felons to keep getting off scot free in a society where justice is blind, and probably
the American public could have held up under the relatively low-grade strain of
buying the idea that the super rich are the job creators.
“Definitely there would have been a good long life in the
notion that austerity is the way to go in a society where the super rich keep
doing better and better than ever before at the expense of all those below
them.
“But no. Year after year after year the military keeps
acting like nothing but a bunch of terrorists in a Global War on Terror they’re
passing off as a noble cause largely by propping up the nonsense that the
terrorists, the people whose people we’ve spent decades if not centuries
pissing off and just flat killing with our policies and actions, hate us for
our freedoms.
“’Dinosaurs’ is all that needs to be said about all the
rabid enemy-hating Jesus lovers in this so-called Christian society, and my own
head has started spinning with all the constant ongoing so-called liberal
media’s spin making the left out to be as responsible as the right for all the
worsening cognitive friction between our actions and what we stand for as a
country.
“In the political realm, without even getting started on the
reality-scrapping Republicans, there’s Obama who all by himself has lopped
probably a decade off the time we had to play with before the dissonance
reached critical mass by keeping up the ludicrous pretense with all those
million-dollar smiles that he’s some kind of good, honest, peace and
Constitution-loving populist not at all owned lock, stock, and barrel by us in
the corporate sector.
“So now we’ve got a labor force petering out all over the
place on the tread wheels of American productivity because some people won’t
stop overloading the Takers with all this incongruity.
“We’re not sure how we’re supposed to keep widening the
wealth divide if American workers can’t keep upping their game enough for us to
keep skimming extra profits off their harder and harder work.
“My best guess is that in the very near future we’re going
to have to just break down and point out the truth under the American people’s
noses—that they live in a full-blown corporatocracy.
“Certainly Americans are not likely to be pleased by this
news, but when their conception of their situation starts squaring better with
the reality, at least their vitality won’t be so sapped by the malaise
associated with so much chronic disequilibrium.”
Said Harriet Stenzel, the Chamber of Commerce’s Chief
Compliance Officer, “Nobody’s crazy about going old school and using brute
force instead of mind control to keep workers hoisting the money upwards. But
if you’re compromising all the minds too much to control them or the bodies
anymore, what are you going to do?”
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