In the aftermath of the unbearable senseless shooting to
death of little children and their educators in Newtown, Connecticut,
Democratic and Republican leaders are banding together in a show of American
bipartisan solidarity as they get back to work on the other issues facing the
grieving nation.
Inspired by White House press secretary Jay Carney’s recent
expedient of using another massacre as a perfect opportunity to keep not
talking about the gun control reforms the majority of Americans have long been
pleading for so the massacres will stop, spokespeople on each side of the
political divide are now echoing the other side to the letter as they make
their argument that the middle of a Global War on Terror is not the time or place
to talk about children-killing drone strikes and the suite of other current and
historical factors that might truly explain why people want to commit acts of
terrorism against America.
In similar unison, both parties are now arguing with renewed
vigor that the middle of a widespread life-ruining economic crisis is no time
to start talking about the obvious and worsening plutocratic economic and
political abuses that created the economic crisis, and that in the thick of the
perennial electioneering cycle it is hardly wise to talk about the suppression
of Democratic votes, and that the time to talk about catastrophic life-ruining
global climate change is not in the thick of the so critical perennial
electioneering cycle much less in the middle of catastrophic global climate
change.
Said White House spokesman Jay Carney at a morning press
conference, “Say what you want about the National Rifleman’s Association, it
can’t be denied that they are among the nation’s most successful special
interest groups in the area of imposing the will of the minority on the
majority.
“Massacre after massacre after massacre, under the toughest
public relations circumstances imaginable, they manage to muzzle any
discussions that might impose majority rule on the country regarding gun
control.
“With the very real possibility that filibuster reform in
the Senate will undo the gains the ideological minority has made through
gerrymandering in the House, we may well need to take a few pages from the
playbooks of the likes of the NRA in these times when the role of government is
to correct for errors in the will of the people.
“When the majority of Americans are standing on the wrong
side of so many issues related to everything from perpetual preemptive war and warrantless
surveillance and health care and economics to marriage equality and the prison
system and women’s rights, we could do a whole lot worse than follow the lead
of the National Rifleman’s Association.”
In related news, Tommy Ruggle, spokesperson for a new coalition
of innocent children’s groups calling itself Children Against Mad People, told
reporters today that he and every kid he knows don’t think the grown-ups are
doing a very good job of taking care of them or their country.
Said Mr. Ruggle, “I’m only a third grader and I can tell
it’s stupid to let everybody have machine guns that shoot real bullets. So can
my sister in kindergarten.
“And also, it’s not fair that rich people get to take almost
all the money, and they get to do whatever they want and never get in any
trouble.
“And we heard that President Obama is killing children with
bombs. Is that true? And also we heard it’s too late to save the world from
getting too hot to live on.
“Anyways, we don’t want our grown-ups to be in charge
anymore. Where can we get different grown-ups?”
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